the guy in front of me just bought a pound of bacon, a bouquet, and a case of budlight, i want to see THAT makeup sex
sperm doesn't mix with malibu too well
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
So I'm looking through your google history on your laptop and you have 'is ketchup even remotely nutritious' and 'alcohol with fewest calories but highest alcohol'. What new fad diet are you on because I feel like we could do this together.
Get over here. It's an emergency. Just realized I haven't hd my mouth on a penis in two weeks. Get over here.
I found out that they tried to reenact the Snooki drop by using a jump rope and the banister. Pictures say it all.
i don't think i ever formally apologized for that time i threw up on your dog.... well...here it is...
#1 lesson to be learned from mardi gras this year: lock your car doors or some grimy dude like me might just bang in it and use your backseat as a kleenex
Hypothetically speaking, what is the proper response if one gets bitten by a most likely not rabid squirrel? Hypothetically.
Then you shook your fists at the sky and explained to us that losing a sneeze is like losing an orgasm
Would jacking off with Benadryl cream be good or bad for the poison oak on my dick?
Im gonna get home and destroy this bag of chicken nuggets with my soul.
I love my cat. she doesnt judge when i stumble in my house drunk and pass out on my floor. my dog looks at me disappointed.
I think everyone at the office can tell I'm dehydrated
you mean still drunk
I've heard it both ways
We could have fun in a cardboard box. Think of the damage we could do at an amusement park!
Randomize
