our cab driver is having phone sex.
hot pretzels for dinner, snacks, and now breakfast...oh to be a poor college student...everyday is like a carnival.
so he came over for the first time and i completely forgot i had pictures of him printed out from facebook on my wall and a newspaper article with him in it.. you can guess that it lead for an awkward situation.
Congratulations, you fucked a nickle into me.
I mean, we do coke and have sex occasionally...I wouldn't call that a relationship.
Better than road-head. Just got model-home-head. Also got a disapproving scowl of judgment from the realtor on the way out.
ASS. GYMANSTICS. OLYMPICS. NOW!!!
Neil John just started open mouth kissing everyone to make sure they are safe.
Not good... He ate my chips. Thats not a sex analogy for anything. My actual potato chips... gone. I lost on both ends.
This guy is selling weed on the train. Like... Straight up. No fucks given.
Im like a saiyan, last weekends hangover will only make me stronger
He told me to leave him behind and bury him in his batman pajamas. So two lessons I guess, don't give Tom whiskey and don't touch his daddy issues with a twenty nine and a half foot pole.
Dude, they hit that lizard part of my brain that tells me to fuck people.
Preach sister.
It was kind of like hidden Mickey ears, but with dicks.
Let me call you later. I’m lining up some office dick now that working at home is ending
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