ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
Me liking this guy is the best diet ever. Do I want this cookie...or do I want to get laid.
I went to the bathroom like 8 times and each time I looked in the mirror and tried saying "I am sober." I burst out laughing when I got to "so-" every time. If you can't convince yourself, you can't convince anyone else. Fuck it, I'm going upstairs and drinking more.
You make your fellow Jews happy.
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
My head. My head is the problem. Also alcoholism.
This hot topless Jamaican just ran down the st with me on his back and He was screaming "I be stealing yo white ladies."
I don't know if i should be jealous or worried... or question where you are.
Idk every story shes told me thats started with "back when i was a lesbian" has been my new favorite story
My bra is still on the porch...I'm leaving it as a reminder to get my shit together.
I want to name my colorful bowl Batman. Why? I still have yet to figure it out. But I'm calling it Batman.
He called some chick he used to fuck for cash to get food delivered to cheer me up
That's the 3rd time in 6 months I woke up on the hallway floor using a towel as a blanket, no clue how I got there. At least back when I was still drinking I could blame something other than myself for that kind of shit.
You should go to AA meetings and warn people about the dangers of sobriety.
Just had a med school interview with that doctor I fucked in college. He remembered. Asked if I still have my nipple rings. Overall, I think it went well.
I was so high last night I honestly think my tears were medicinal
You sat down in the middle of the road and started crying. We told you "Get your ass up or we're leaving you here." You replied "They'll findddd meeeeee" and ran after us.
when you come over can you bring tequila and my birth control? Thanks girl!
Randomize
