No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
I told him I'm not paying rent anymore because he's seen my boobs.
he thought i was passed out so he proceeded to jerk off while i lay on the floor next to him
I woke up and went to my kitchen naked and decided I wanted a fruit cup. Ate said fruit cup. Look over and notice my male neighbor is staring at me
i called my brother from the living room and paid him a dollar to turn off the light in my room. ive hit rock bottom
Never underestimate the healing power of vomiting and a bath.
he fucked my hip out of place.
I'm hoping he'll tell everyone how great in bed I am. Well, how great in bathroom floor I am.
I totally intended to come to the hotel, but I woke up in a parking lot
The struggle is real.
I wound up running down the street in 12 degree weather in just my bra and then fell asleep cuddling my bottle. You tell me how last night went.
She said she was sober from drugs for a week. All I heard was Kenny Loggins singing Danger Zone.
On a scale of 1-10, how inappropriate is it to sneak into someone's box of sex toys and put googly eyes on their vibrator?
There is an episode of "how it's made" on tv right now. The subject is tequila and water beds. Basically my life.
I'm gonna be late for work because i decided to masturbate and forgot to put my clothes in the dryer
It's been three years since Kelly shit in the to go box that we put in Sam's mailbox after we broke up. Considering Sam and I are friends again, should I finally tell him?
Randomize
