Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
but the good news is i woke up with 15 dollars in my pocket so i probably sold my phone instead of puking on it
Thanks for stopping me from doing a one man keg stand by myself clad in only a towel. that probably wouldve ended badly.
Its so akward after he cums on my face. like usually the porn just ends
Does it make me a prostitute if I accepted a Life House concert ticket for giving this guy head?
No. It just means your good at giving head.
Given my current decline of critical thinking and capacity for speech it's probably best u call the cops
he kept saying that we were in ian's fun time place and then continued to act like a dinosaur.
there may have been a blood oath never to speak of it again...only reason i can think of as to why there was a 1 inch bloody cut on my right boob
we turned the lights off and all you could see were my glow in the dark stars and his penis
There are far too many naked dudes in your apartment, and they aren't even watching porn. I mean seriously, they've got the Lion King on.
I don't want my vagina anymore.
HIS DICK IS GLORIOUS AND I WANT TO RIDE IT TO VALHALLA
Yes be both agreed it was the worst sex in the history of fornication, so I asked him to sign the condom wrapper so I could frame it as a reminder to NEVER sleep with him again
Of course his mom thinks you're nice, she doesn't know you have sex for cheeseburgers
One time!! I like sex and food....
long story short... we may or may not have lost your car.
Randomize
