i pounded out a 17-yr-old on saturday night
no, that is not a typo
i turned her down on fri night, googled the state consent laws & then caved on saturday
maybe if i keep dancing i won't throw up
Btw, I'm creating an event on fb to celebrate the one yr anniversary since we went to jail.
Some guy walked in while I was taking a piss and asked me if I knew of a back way out of the bar. He looked pretty freaked out.
Then me, her, and her mom snorted tequila. The bartender was in shock.
unless you have a dick and you were thinking of chopping that off
I sent him a tit pic with the caption, "Mt. Arie and Mt. Hola are ready for expedition." Too nerdy?
I'm taking a shit break of discontent as a personal protest
I feel badly that he has cancer, but this does not mean I am obligated to have sex with him. Again.
Can't tell if waking up covered in easy mac is the sign of an amazing or terrible night
So I think I've successful blown my foot off in a way that's going to make you call me an idiot.
I just put condoms in a mason jar because it looked prettier than the box.I think I've peaked.
I'm at a Tim Horton's and two girls just came in handcuffed to eachother
I don't care that he's really strong. I need him to make me cum not fix my back problems
she referred to her cum as “pussy butter” so needless to say we had a good night
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