what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
guess who just spent driver's ed figuring out how to draw a guy giving head
FYI, if you pee in my bed (or even let R___ and E___ sleep in it), I will fart loudly during your wedding vows. Trust.
Thanks for holding onto me so I didn't fall in my pee in that parking lot. You're the best boyfriend ever.
There is no excuse for watching a Jesse McCartney movie.
i wish semen tasted like chocolate
Before I left in the morning I deleted her purity ring app off her iPod, I figured it would save her the shame
I fucked her while she was wearing her boyfriends dogtags. I'm officially a bad american
A burger king employee called me from your phone while you were on their bathroom floorl. Hope ur not in jail....4 realz
I don't remember what happened but judging from the contents of my pockets it had something to do with potatoes and glo in the dark condoms
I'm trying to figure if this dude sitting in his car with the door open is dead or just sleeping. Someone was probably wondering the same thing bout me 20 minutes ago. Your meeting is taking a ridiculous amount of time.
He was supposed to visit me tonight but he decided to stop in Tacoma so now I'm sitting on my bed naked eating oranges and candy corn while I watch Parks and Rec.
Now I have to hook up with him tomorrow DURING THE DAY.
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
Shes yelled my World of Warcraft name when we were having sex, I think marriage is next.
My Mini-Van Handjob Milf is leaving the company. I need to find a new job. I can’t handle this place without those handjobs
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