shes hot in the i'd deny it if anyone asked kinda way
For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
I like how you refer to peeing in the car as "super cute"
I think their strategy was based on people bein at a beach, seein a rainbow, and havin an orgasm at the same time.
Sometimes I wish I could open my skin and just take a little peek at my liver. You know, just to see if it's rotten yet or still perfect looking.
Dude she's famous. She's on an episode of campus pd. Can't not fuck her
we are out of drugs. and patience. please bring former.
all law school has taught me so far is how to fart quietly during lectures and how to out-argue the ice cream guy when he screws me out of extra toppings.
If I die tonight and was cremated, you could probably get high off the smoke.
Soooo you know how I said I was trying to be a rational adult? Well that led to me fucking a rational adult today.
I'm a hopeless romantic with the sex drive of a married politician. IM DOOMED.
I pelvic thrusted so hard while he was eating me out that his nose started bleeding. I think it's broken. Trophy scars, right?
I was just in the bathroom and some guy yelled all hail the king... i cant go anywhere without getting recognized anymore.
The police officer that arrested me Friday night just bought me a shot
Randomize
