i'm signing you up for texting rehab
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
So I just googled the ten commandments... Were fucked.
Just thought i should tell someone im on the roof, if i pass out up here because no one found me, im behind the chimney
i'm sure god appreciates how great my boobs look during this fine christmas eve mass
A client gave me a bottle of vodka today. And he was hot with a beard. It's like he knows my soul.
my mom was by far the drunkest one there. best impromptu wednesday afternoon party ever
The only reason I can fathom that you've been able to continue to date new people this long is that women continue to become of age each year, and the younger ones don't know any better.
I don't want to get pregnant doggy style. That's sad.
THE FASTEST WAY TO MY HEART IS THROUGH FAMILY SIZED BAGS OF GENERIC BRAND CHEESE BALLS
He obv doesn't know that telling a woman to chill will get him murdered
He said I have the “Denzel Washington” of vaginas.
My parents heard a lamp fall and crash and the dogs were barking like crazy so my mom got up to check. she found you peeing in a corner by the tv. And you kept shhhing her.
this is the second night in a row i've fucked a guy i met on craigslist. and it wasn't even a post for sex. i posted a housing ad. A HOUSING AD
CTFD. There’s plenty of dick in the sea! This is Vegas, we import dick. \nWorst case scenario we get a rental penis
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