I think the sex offender registry is kind of a VIP list. You get to not live near noisy schools and parks and all your neighbors get to know you.
The highlight of my Saturday night was singing along to the sound of music alone in my room.
pretty sure that I broke my nose during sexting. Life is grand.
You know your from las vegas when the girl on the stage in the strip club was in my US gov class senior year
i was considerably less excited after they told me my present didnt have a penis
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
Oh by the way, john gave me your shirt to return to you when I was at work today. I almost gave him his girlfriends underwear to return to her but figured it would be inappropriate.
all a girl really needs is a few good pair of leggings and a drug dealer that delivers.
I'm not THAT invested in seeing you to an orgasm
You never know true fear until you're on your period in a house full of white furniture.
He isn't understanding any of my Fetty Wap references. He may not be a keeper after all.
Our friendship just got weirder. He snapchated me the porn he was watching.
Are you serious?! She sent a pizza instead of showing up?!
She did indeed. Papa Johns. It helped because I was super hangry. That bitch is smart!
suburban family judging/laughing at us after Jenna just pulled two flasks out of her boot on the subway
what the fuck happened to the tacos
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