I miss you like a fat girl misses the prom.
sometimes i wish i was the girl in a porno. that way if i couldn't get any, i'd just order a pizza and do him.
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
he asked me to have sex with him by saying 'take one for the team'. so no we didn't do it.
Just had a handjob preempted by a huge bolt of static electricity leaping from her fingertip to my sack. I hate this time of year.
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
But I aced my quizzes. Apparently flash card beer pong is an acceptable form of studying.
you can only text me tonight if its in drake lyrics. thats the rule
Pretty sure the guy I hooked up with Saturday gave me a buy one get one free coupon for chipotle. Who said nice guys don't exist?
I just want to sing to him and rub baby oil on his head
Well, he didn't buy me a birthday present but he sure did give me chlamydia so there's that.
I had sex with a boy who lives in a closet, that's like having sex with Harry Potter, right?
how much of this shit do i need to take before i think its a good idea to set the house on fire and scream satanic mantras?
I would be down to associate sex w taco bell
I can't say too many people would say watching their drunk best friends fuck in a hot tub is very normal.
Randomize
