he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
Last night my friend tried to make out with me in an olive garden. Ahahah
Nothing says 'I love you' like never ending salad and breadsticks
Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
hey dude i know youre in the next room but me and your sister need a condom, got any i could borrow?
Just made a pepperoni sandwich with cheese, mayo, and pickles. Poverty is like pot, without the happy feeling.
I got it! After our exam we take shots for every question we skipped!!!
I don't wanna die...
While you were puking in the ocean I was rubbing your back saying "Just give it back to Mother Earth".
Step 1: drink. 2: drink more. 3: go for it. 4a: success. 4b: drink more. 5. drink. 6. go for other girls. 7. drink more. Sound good?
I think I actually have rug burn on my eye.
making an indian outfit so we can be pochohantas and john smith and fuck in the canoe on the night float
I decided they need a food cart that just roams around the library like the cotton candy people at the circus. But with real food. like tacos cause it sounds delicious.
We were fucking while the tv was on, and one of those animal cruelty commercials came on. We then switched over and started doing it doggy style. It was then that I realized that I'm going to hell.
Fell asleep in the library, woke up because I almost let out a sleep fart. That was close.
The sad part is that if I don't get a random pic of your balls or ass or both every month, I start to worry that we're not friends anymore
Our nipples touched last night. It was tender.
Randomize