You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
I attract so much trash. The guy that is engaged and kissed me is here so is his fiancé. I feel likeshw knows and will cut me in the bathroom might happen. If I'm not at the pool tomorrow she has blonde hair and is really flat.
Just once id like a girl to say to me in the dracula voice, i want...to suck...your dick...
She's 40ish and I couldn't wake her up with a stick of dynamite. My sheets are going to be covered in glitter lotion and smell like grape vodka and shattered dreams tomorrow.
Aren't divorce parties fun?
You and I have very different definitions of fun.
we made out at a charity event. really i was helping the fight against aids...
20 bottles of wine, 3 cases or beer, and 5 bottles in my kitchen... My parents are teasing me.
I'm chatting with a girl missing a front tooth. I find it quite distracting. I'm sure you have deduced what bar I'm drinking in on this monday night.
She is the absolute last thing I would want to screw. Honestly. Fellating a porcupine. Higher on the list.
Are you considering all the consequences of doing your boss or are you just rationalizing with your vagina?
I'd say things got weird when I started doing lines of molly in the box.
The family next to you was not pleased
If I never see my landlord's dick again, it'll be too soon.
he said he was going grocery shopping but when he came back all he had was a jumbo bag of pancake mix and case of beer.
the essentials, lol
I wanted to write an apology letter to my vagina after that.
I saw the president of my women in business club at the bar last night...I was gonna thank her for teaching me the business skills to create my own fake to get in... then i decided not
Security showed up because apparently we were fucking too loud.
As your roommate I can attest that y'all do indeed fuck rather loudly
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