I thidmdmk you'gre a special person
i'm really high, and this is sooooooooooo important. how many frosties does it take to fill a bathtub?
You're the 8th person from last night to text me this morning and ask if I'm ok.
She said to delete the bj video, but I accidentally hit the 'send to her bf' button. My bad
Just had a nice conversation with my landlord while cleaning your puke off my car
I know its been a few months but you must know you hve the 2nd biggest dick I've ever seen. 1st place went to a rapper so don't feel bad.
We've been here 3 hours and the only 1 word answer she didn't give was the drink order. Don't think I'm getting laid tonight
How can he have such a manly penis and baby hands?!
DICK PUNCH EXTRAVAGANZAAAAAA!!!!!
you passed out while setting up your phones timer to time how long it would take before you to passed out.
They just keep looking funny at me. No one has attempted to tell me that I don't make sense though so maybe they're all way more high than I am.
You can laugh all you want but 99 grapes is a lot stronger than what you were drinking.
I just ate cottage cheese and went to the gym at 6 this morning...the things i'll do because I might get naked in front of a new boy
My mom just offered to be my designated driver tonight. I love being an adult.
so i may or may not have just had sex on the stage of the lecture hall....
Randomize
