This girls a $30 bar tab from being bi
i hate when i ask a girl what she's being for halloween and the first word isn't "slutty"
PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
my life trainwreck boards at 9:30
I found out during it when he said "my girlfriend never does this" so he's all to blame, I had no idea until half way through.
260 beers this month. I need a new hobby.
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
You kept running up to random groups of people and saying "I'm a Dallas Cowboy Cheerleader so we all have to chug our drinks!" and they all listened to you.
He's probably hung over. I sure as hell am. I want to pop out my eyeballs with a fork and soak them in cold water
Do you know how disconcerting it is to hear the sound a dog makes while it drinks water and find out that it's someone eating you out?
When you get up and look at yourself in the mirror, don't be alarmed. The doctor assured us last night that it looked way worse than it actually was and there won't be a scar when the stitches come out
Sup man, did you have a 3way this month if so it would be 3 for 3 for the house
As a side note, can you ask the maintenance staff not to drag their balls on our stairwell handrails. Please.
got cock blocked by the cops again. two of the cops were the same ones from that t bell incident and they recognized me... they still dont like me
Laying in bed naked is fun. I now see why guys love boobs... They're sooo bouncy! This long distance relationship is really killing my sex life.
Randomize