why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
Her hair smelled like a rat dipped in mustard on fire
Good to know: if a hot girls asks to go back to my place, she probably just needs to vomit all over my bathroom
The key to alley sex is drunkeness.
Is shaving my mustache contingent on you sleeping over tonight?
Its hard to hear the music in here over his nasal whistle. And his breath smells like old milk. I think I need more vodka, and he better be buying. You owe me.
Unemployment check just came in. As soon as I stop pretending I have morals I'm buying weed. Puff puff pass uncle sam.
Are the homeless actually allowed to bathe in fountains located on Main Street in downtown Houston? Can Houston TX be so progressive as to condone public bathing?
You're fucking beautiful as shit and we should have loving sex...
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
Embrace your curves. Cuz we're too poor for a coke habit.
I had sex on a dinosaur comforter, tell me that does not define my life.
Be my booze princess bebe. I'll rescue you from the lame tidings you are confined to up in the sober castle.
I woke up in my neighbors backyard with glitter on my teeth and sparklers super glued on my bra. which part was your fault?
Also I will be receiving my own bra in the mail because I left it at his place, woops
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