I think i sorta joined a cult last night
dude that girl has seen more cock ends then weekends
I swallowed and made him pancakes in the morning. I feel almost as desperate as Jennifer Aniston at this point.
Also, I'm sewing my entire Halloween costume by hand. I better get laid at every single party I go to.
Same here... Well I was planning on having some sort of deep conversation, but looking at how grim of an outlook tomorrow has on you, I'll just re-inform you that I have your pants.
Just found puke on my backpack while sitting in class. It's like this weekend won't leave me alone.
There's a 35% chance I'm still residually drunk from last night.
And you say you're not good with numbers...
Bone him for me, BONE HIM TWICE FOR ME.
If, when you wake up, you're wondering why you're in the bathtub, it's because when I tried to move you, you yelled that that was cheating and tried to kick me in the face.
Fair enough.
Worst drunk idea ever... Me "Cops are looking for two guys, one in a grey shirt one in a blue shirt" jelly "lets take out shirts off they'll never find us" of course I thought it was brilliant
I'm going to try and loofah my hangover away.
Update: It didn't work
I have an interview tomorrow and listed you as a reference. If they call you, please don't tell them about the time I smuggled a Chalupa out of Taco Bell in my underwear.
I feel as though my head has drastically changed shape
Today one of my patients offered me pot brownies. Medical school worth it. Living the dream.
He literally shouted this Viking war cry when he cam. Then as we laid there he sang me the most beautiful rendition of " When Irish Eyes are Smiling". I've never been more confused.
Randomize
