Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
My passouts and memory loss are great training for when I have alzheimers. You'll know where to look when I get lost.
I AM OVULATING LIKE A STEAM ENGINE.
I mean, how many people can say they helped surgically remove something from their body? Other than the guy that got his hand stuck under a rock and cut it off. Doesn't count
I'm stranded in the Hampton area. Looks like I'm going to have to take one for the team and pass out by this applebees.
ps if your frozen peas taste like crotch it's because some dude kicked me in the nuts while trying to do a keg stand and I needed an ice pack
Apparently I texted my high school english teacher asking her to tell me what logical fallacies she taught us three years ago.
I mean i can't really be mad...either way i was gonna fuck him or hate fuck him, so it's basically a win/win situation.
Why do I have a missed call from "The Anaconda" ?
Your text makes more sense read in reverse.
Plus my fingers were hella swollen from eating all these cured meats so it was like I was given it to her with Hulk Hands on
Of course I'm watching space shows while stoned on the science channel. Why would I want to learn while not baked out of my skull?
This reminds me of the time you were crying and puking in the toilet at that party while i did shots of tequila in between blow drying your feet. miss you!
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
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