Hey i just realized that im masturbating in the exact same kind of chair that they are doing it on in this porno
Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
i just hugged the lady at the liquor store goodbye for the summer...
Right now im sitting at home and all i can think about is im eating calories and i should be out drinking them.
wanna hang out tonight and remember it?
Is snow just God skeeting all over the place??
Yes. Yes it is.
Just watched a deer get gangbanged in my front yard by 5 bucks. Wtf animal kingdom
We jumped on a random trolley because total strangers offered us free vodka. We're not even on the route map as far as I can tell. I see now how those people died in "Hostel"... we deserve whatever happens to us tonight.
He and I are basically the same person, except he has a glorious penis and I have glorious breasts.
he said he did everything he could to puke on his nurses because they were doing everything wrong
Thats admirable.
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
Take a good hard look at your life. And the number of 18-20 year olds that you have made out with in the last 6 months... and then keep doing whatever the fuck you want.
I'm hurting so bad I actially had to wait for my mini wheats to get soggy before I could eat them..
Okay let's look at your past accomplishments you've done hungover... Sat great score, academic decathlon, state for track. I think you are solid to go out tonight
I snorted xanax while wearing reindeer antlers. Prancer gone wild. Have a merry Christmas.
Randomize
