A joint and a Nerds Rope = breakfast of champions for the unemployed
Christmas on farmville was waaaaay better than my actual Christmas.
Well his aunt was in the next room so we had to be quiet. I felt like i was on an episode of silent library.
What's your middle initial? I need it for the census. I put us down as "unmarried partners."
Oh my god... you're gay. Ps, its A.
No no. According to the 2010 US Census, we're gay.
just upper decked a verizon store cause they don't cover against "getting phone crushed by a keg." had to pay 175 for a new one
Remember the girl passed out in front of my fireplace?
Clusterfucked is a frowned upon word in work related emails
i wish his balls had a scratch and sniff sticker elsewhere so i would know before i even went down there
You are softly singing to the wall while slow dancing with it. I feel as though you should discontinue this behavior.
Just doin' what I do best: sitting in a stall in the class building's bathroom, pondering life and exploring deep, dark corners of the internet before class.
A little boy in a bathroom stall just shouted "mom where's your penis?? Is it inside you?"
jut tell him gently that you'd rather spend more time with his dick than his face
Yep that's the face of someone whose dick I would put in my mouth without hesitation
Chili is not acceptable fuck buddy food.
I got home and he was wearing a suit. He said he reason was because it was shirt and tie Saturday and that he won't change until midnight. He then proceeded to answer the door in a British accent.
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