you better believe me or I'll punch you in the face
i wish starbucks made bloody marys
We just got home. I got some malt liqour and a lottery ticket so I'm really doing a lot with my life right now
I got a lot accomplished today, and the day is still young! I built a fort, hot boxed a fort, had a tea party in a fort, and now realizing how high I am.
I'd suck anything for a pizza right now
We probably shouldn't have forced that guys cat to drink the grey goose while we were doing lines in his bathroom
When I like her vacation photos, it really means "Im sleeping with your boyfriend." wonder if she will make the connection.
seriously my hangover is so bad I feel like my eye lashes make blinking a workout
I don't think my prof knows we've noticed her No Bra Fridays.
I was gonna tell her, but there were too many tongues in my mouth
He's German, so by default he gets to fuck me.
He keeps texting me videos of fish swimming in his fish tank, so I think it's safe to say he's back on weed.
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
it was the kind of sex that I don't even know how my hair extentions are still in
Nothing like ripping open the box with your keys on a sat R train and throwing back the morning after pill with some coconut water on my way to work at a fitness studio for free
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