its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
The cereal milk was almost black, the bacon was still frozen and the toast was soggy. And that was BEFORE I puked in her lap.
at last call she tried to get the bartender to fill her flask. when he refused, i had to stop her from trying to pour the rest of her beer in there.
I believe you called it tequila and nipples. The proceeded to strike a pose.
I packed spaghetti and rum. But panties? Nah
My vag hurts but I feel vindicated
That is an interesting emotion combo
His arresting officer when they were busting up the squat party recognized him from the anti-drone protest. He was like Jesus kid, you were sober last time.
I'm pretty sure there a million tiny ninjas in my uterus poking me with sticks.
I walk in and my roomie is fucking her bf while wearing lingerie and minnie mouse ears. Right in the childhood.
I'm mopping my WALLS now. And talking to my mop. I literally just told it "yeah I kno that dirt doesn't wanna come off but were gonna get aren't we?" This is some good snow!!! mini maid needs to give it to their maids. The world would be spotless!!!!
The only way he could ever pleasure me is if he lit himself on fire and let me watch
Tequilla is a sneaky bitch ninja that doesn't kick in until you least expect it. Then BAM! You're peeing in unconventional places.
How ya feelin' champ?
Like a million bucks that was soaked in alcohol.
All I remember is me taking my automatic nerf gun getting on top of him and saying..."look whos in control now!"
I'm noticing I drink less and do fewer lines when I do both together.
Now that's what I call smart money management.
Randomize
