then she made me sanitize my hands before fingering her...i may have found my soulmate
...i had to draw her a diagram of her own vagina. including a little arrow to the clitoris. shouldn't it be the other way around?!?
So she is eating her margarita with tortilla chips....like using her chip as a spoon
I wish real life had facebook tags so i could figure out who all these people are
What'd you guys eat?
Literally everything that was frozen.
you woke me up in the middle of the night to tell me you were taking off your pants and it was not an invitation.
i dont care. it has been a 14 hour day, and we are all celebrating by alternating shots and grilled cheese.
We decided it was acceptable to walk out of class on a quest for Doritos. That high.
did i just see you in the movie theater carrying a margarita into Frozen?
All the 6 year olds are jealous of my alcohol
You couldn't even walk but you came into the kitchen with the funnel and begged me to put beer in it
I did all i could do but i woke up smelling like cigars and theres salsa all over my face
Yes. Ice cream tacos are an important aspect in the bridge of friendship
Do you have Pokemon Go yet? I just caught a Clefairy on my walk of shame and feel way better about myself.
I got copblocked.
What?
Cockblocked. By a cop. Copblocked.
Listen, you can either give me drugs or an orgasm. You decide.
Randomize
