She said her name was "party"
six shots in, he is hammered and doing stretches before each shot
He gave Paula abdoul a run for her crazy
The plan is to make enough mistakes this weekend to hold me over until spring break
eat the baked goods on the counter at your own risk... i made them while i was angry and drunk so they most likely have pubes in them
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
What wine did you feed Jack? Might not want to waste the good stuff on kitties. Kitties only get box wine.
I started scrolling back in our texts looking for context and a picture of your dick rose like the Great Pumpkin in the middle of my screen.
Neighbour is sobbing. Difficult to masturbate.
How did you tell her we met?
I told her that we met at the sex shop down the street, I thought it would be the most reasonable explanation.
You know you have a problem when your man yells at you that his penis is not your personal play toy.
Just found out the last guy I hooked up with is being held in a federal prison under suspicion of stealing 175k.
you said you were going to the bathroom. we found you an hour later laying in the backyard clutching a bottle of vodka while singing the beatles and crying
I mean his penis was perfect in pictures but its even more perfect inside me
I basically spent the entire weekend in bed with that red head.Every time I tried to leave she got me too horny to think straight. I was kidnapped by vagina
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