So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
U dropped me off n it hit me, i made it inside for exactly shit thirty on the nose, another minute n i would of had brown trowsers
is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
this text is just filler to avoid a lull in the conversation
thank god dogs can't talk. they see way to much.
our landlord thinks we're weird & alcoholics. he came in to fix our broken tub and saw the laundry door on our table for beer pong, the garbage bag full of empty fifths, and that one armed baby on the doorstep. plus he saw us swimming and yargging in our pirate pool that one time.
Let's put it this way, it's 9am and that box of wine looks like the cure
Well, I was going to ask you what happened to all my lipstick. Until I saw the giant red penis on my living room wall.
My roommate didn't flush after her miscarriage. Time to drink myself blind. I need you for moral support. Or so I don't have to drunkenly cry alone anymore. Whatever, help.
if creating a fake 8 year old brother, who lives with me and has had mono for the past month, to explain why I have ignored my group project members is wrong, then I... well then I'm probably going to hell
You drunkenly hook up with 5 people in one night and suddenly everyone tries to party with you.
I'm mailing you cans of corn and that's final.
I mean I only got hit in the ass with ONE firework
I can't believe I watched you put a tampon in in the parking garage
I found my bra I wore on Friday night...he fucked the underwire out of it
hahahahaha
Randomize
