sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
I fink we're distracting them from bumping the proverbial uglies
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
Shots and making dong molds for my gf's friends. Typical Monday night activities.
I wish my head, heart, dick, and nose could just agree on something for once
Getting my nails done with Diana... I'm going for the keep your friends close and the girl who's dating the guy you want to fuck closer
Someone just got pizza delivered to the liquor store.
GUESS WHO STILL HAS BOTH NIPPLES!
He's all enlightened and liberal. My next beefcake will be much more Neanderthal.
I yelled "NO FLEX ZONE!!!" at the guy that thinks it's cool to take off his shirt at the party then proceeded to puking
Did I tell you that I told him I deleted his dick pics and he almost started crying?
I'm about 40% drunk. You know, not drunk enough to light the bar on fire, but drunk enough to let the cougar hit on me.
I am beginning to doubt your commitment to my making poor choices tonight
Pooping to opera.
IT'S MY BIRTHDAY. I SHOULDN'T HAVE TO DRIVE 3 HOURS FOR BIRTHDAY SEX.
Randomize
