Dude i fell asleep inside of her
thats awesome
I don't understand why some guys want to have a huge conversation while standing at the urinal with cock in hand...
Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
I just wanna buy a tempur-pedic so i can drink in bed and not spill
I just claimed my unemployment in Vegas. This seems wrong.
there was a kid getting taken out of the waterpark handcuffed to a wheelchair singing "tryna catch me ridin dirty"
And here i was gonna offer you a complimentary blowjob.
Congrats on having the best tasting nipple at the bar last night.
Sorority life is like alcoholic girl scouts, plus douchebags in polos.
If there was a bread and water delivery truck id make sweet hungover love with it.
I'm just waiting for the avalanche of beef.
It's gotten to the point that when I close my eyes to cum all I see is candy crush
it was just another one of those moments where you unfriendzone a friend you assumed to be gay
I think sunday funday got a little out of control. There is cheese slices and BBQ sauce all over the roof and 4 empty bottles of vodka in my room.
I woke up next to him with nothing on and my thong around his neck. I just put my clothes on and left, but he still has my thong.
Randomize
