i sleep in a fine layer of vodka and semen. i don't know that that would appropriate for a pajama rally.
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
while you've been gone this has kinda turned into some sort of fivesome-type thing. just thought i should warn you for when you get back
Oh damn. God have mercy on everything w a dick in a ten mile radius.
Dude next time u fuck on our counters will u please let me know BEFORE I make lunch.
Denial and avoidance are my survival strategies for 2013.
Denial, avoidance and beer.
So good!! I became real good friends with an adorable black lesbian couple from Baltimore and a man in a diaper.
Next think I knew I was pretty much using his penis as a microphone... No more playing Eminem during hookups
I just found glitter from our Father's Day party on my balls this morning.
DAD WTF
Reason # 294827284949272 i could never be a cop. I would just shoot. All the time. Ppl. Animals. Inanimate objects. Air.
My boss doesn't know what jello shots are. I've lost faith in this company.
I'm going to a one year olds birthday party to smoke weed. What has my life become.
While strippers were eating ones out of my boobs, several sources claimed trump shared classified info with the russians. We should get hammered on Mondays more often, bitch.
I felt like a slutty ass cruella devil driving your old car, And I got in a fight with your wipers
Sorry. I was preoccupied thinking about penises
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