found some acid from a couple months ago while looking through christmas lights. Looks like santa came early this year.
she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
you broke a plate. told her her wedding china was ugly and you were doing her a favor. then proceeded to break every plate you could get your hands on.
Second night spent with creepy guy. I either need to change his nickname or stop doing this.
So roofie roulette was a success but I'm a little worried that the 2 who got the tainted beer still haven't contacted anyone...
That big chick who gave you the handly polished off one of the walls to the ginger bread house right before she came outside. FYI
And on the seventh day, God carefully sculpted your cock to fit perfectly into my masterpiece of a vagina. Then he rested. Look it up.
So I think my aunt and her one legged boyfriend are getting it on in the next room. Traumatized does not even begin to describe what I am right now
$645 later, she's throwing up in my washroom and asking for a cab. Hooker are soooo much cheaper.
Guess who just got out of a ticket because the cop liked her costume? THIS GIRL.
Masturbating during the Olympics and cumming during the national anthem really is everything it's cracked up to be. Just thought you should know.
why are there 3 differently sized panties on our kitchen counter?
He invited to drink but spelled forties wrong so no thx
Let's drink lean at the 5 seconds of summer concert. Give the teens a glimpse into their future as dysfunctional adults holding desperately onto their youth. You in?
Yep. The ghost of my sex life is in your house.
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