check it out our google latitudes are spooning
Update, blind date is cute and fun.
Scratch that, blind date just threw up.
yay, now i'm not the only homewrecker.
yeah but i stopped sleeping with him after i found out he was married.
New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
so my dad walked in on us having sex
lulz really? why?
lets just say he wont be answering to 'daddy' for a loooooong time
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
why are our drunk alter egos so much more successful than us?
Your ankle brace is here and the saw is charged. Grab some vodka that cast is coming off tonight.
Smoked before work and just remembered i left pringles in my desk last time i was high. SCORE
you puked in the bathtub and said "let them pee"
That guy is like a clown car of sexy. Just when I think I've seen it all, THERE'S MORE.
AND SOME IN THE TRUNK.
Most girls get hit on with a $7.00 drink. You get hit on with a $750K plane.
Someone I just met told me they were going to name their kid after me. Daylight savings is weird.
Not sure if your roommate speaks German while sleeping, or if she woke up, figured out we were fucking, and used German to swear at us.
i keep smelling vagina and donuts, which pretty much sumarises this morning. happy birthday.
Randomize
