I have two black x marks on my hands.
Yep you got cut off last night after a stripper bent over in front of you and you screamed very loudly 'I can see your soul from here'
damnit I wish I could remember that.
normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
No dude, you can't hot box a bus shelter.
Disney World has no open container laws. Ohmygod this place is even cooler than it was when I was ten.
You threw up on yourself, then proceeded to tell us "to not make a mess in your car"
He told me that "my little fuckpig" was a term of endearment in Britain. I think I'm in love.
random memory from the wedding, the bartender show us how to open the windows of the hotel and pee out of them
the mexican frat downstairs started singing this mariachi song, then out of nowhere some dude busts out a trumpet and plays along. is this even real?
I am very happy to share that the hospital says the testicle pain is normal and that they are going to take care of it.
He had really great hair, but he told me he's been in a psych ward three times. I mean I know I'm a psych major, but that's too much.
The best part of Easter was watching all his colorblind cousins try to find the eggs.
Jesus Christ. Even your cock has to be an overachiever. :-(
I don't have any soul left to be crushed.
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
Dude i just passed out while getting head...she cried
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