Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
he took off his pants and apologized in advance if I thought he was too small.
How can people commit suicide when things like bagels exist
Everytime I see a couple on campus walking and holding hands I just want to yell he's gonna lie!
She just stuck her hand down the strippers pants. Shit just got real.
I bought this skirt with every intention to have it wrapped around my tits by the end of the night. So, I'm not a whore. I'm a self-fulfilling prophecy.
not sure how we got back down, broken rib says we didn't use stairs
Help. Me. He just whispered 'prepare yourself', & sprayed hairspray everywheres to make sure the 'air was crisp'
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
I'm just gonna clean the house so my Mom won't think I'm hung over. I'll just start with the toilet
I think the lady at jack in the box started crying when we put in our order.
5 minutes Isn't even long enough to bring me even close to an orgasm. How selfish. Think about baseball and fuck me you idiot.
Today was brought to you by the letter B for beer and bourbon and the number fuck you I'm meant to be studying not hungover
Nothing warms my heart more than the sight of a naked hockey player in my bed.
You kept shouting about how you were the king of all bitches...and doors, for some reason.
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