apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
I fell asleep with crest white strips on and ate one...
I just told my boyfriend I think I might be pregnant using Emoji icons....
which icon did you use to tell him he's not the father?
I am laying on the kitchen floor eating cold chicken fingers and drinking wine. welcome to my new years party.
She sang Bad Romance to me. Not really the answer I was looking for.
Judging by the hole in the wall by the door, the mis-matched shoes by the door, and the door hanging off one hinge... i'd say he's on the loose.
What a dumb baby whore.
I just woke up in my ex-boyfriends bed, with my new boyfriends jersey on. I love March maddness.
I sincerely hope you find your fuck buddy and have a wonderful night of champagne and whores
I cannot even describe to you the most amazing ass I have ever had the pleasure of seeing walk up the stairs in front of me just now.
May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
I've had more lap dances than hrs of sleep since Thursday, this is why you're planning all three of my bachelor parties
She wants to have a threesome with Taylor Swift. I think this is the kind of love my grandparents spoke of.
His idea of a night out is drinking beer in the driveway. He's been on house arrest too long
I'm at a Tim Horton's and two girls just came in handcuffed to eachother
Randomize
