I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
put your butt on the phone this is a booty call
It wasn't awkward until he started humming the Rocky theme song in the middle of fucking
I would dunk an oreo in her breast milk
I wish scraping a resin bowl could be considered cleaning.
I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
I tried to explain to him that we just wanted a stereotypical black friend to be in our group. He didn't take it too well... Never take me to the bar again.
I think a used vibrator from amazon.com is a great valentines day gift foe my ex.
Did they have a limo or was i just stoned?
Whenever you feel bad about your life, just remember the time I tried to swim while high and thought for a minute I was genuinely drowning
Apparently my face was in the trashcan and in between throw ups I was screaming LOS DIABLOS. I woke up this morning with a bird flying around my room. Nobody seems as concerned as I am.
His ass WILL be my cock's next vacation home.
I wish I had a dick so I could say shit like that.
He offered to buy me free breakfast if I stayed at the hotel overnight with him. I then realized they have a complimentary breakfast.
come over. We can flirt with the criteria for substance abuse and talk about our daddy issues
I want to but I can't have a boner while doing a install and working with a customer
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