so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
I just found cold cuts in the blender. You and beefeater can no longer have unsupervised parties.
You spilled spaghetti on the floor, and kept telling the noodles to "settle down" as you tried to clean it up
Please tell me you're throwing the cats into this foot of snow.
sorry for allegedly lighting the beer pong balls of fire
Just rinsed and put my styrofoam cup of noodles in the dishwasher. I need to be not hungover ASAP
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
He's saved in my phone as 'MURICA. I think it's safe to say I'm not exactly taking him seriously.
OMG he dropped his pants for me. Granted it was to show me where he got stabbed but still...
It must be love. I'm deleting my porn for him.
He washed his dick in my kitchen sink after sex. I think he might be a keeper.
Ate his Chinese food and drank his beer and played with his chihuahua. All while wrapped in a towel while he was sleep.
Tbh you just need to fuck it out like I don't know another solution
He told me he loved me and I told him I shit myself
Well she's 'call Wayne Gretzky a whore' drunk so you tell me.
Randomize
