Do you remember getting into a Delorean last night?
I thought I drunk dialed Adam last night and left him a voicemail. I just checked my phone. I realize I left a drunk voicemail with my son's teacher.
do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
She said, "I don't really go out much, but my husband recently cheated on me" and I don't remember anything after that.
Come over we're drinking with orange soda as a chaser to honor 90s nick kenan and kel.
ARE YOU GOING TO SACRIFICE YOUR LIFE FOR MCDONALDS HASHRBOWNS
My bed smells like stale sex...I want it to smell like fresh sex, I miss you.
Well at one point he got ahold of my archery gear.. And I. Shit. You. Not. Sarah took an arrow to the knee.
Unless your apartment has 3 am pancakes Im not coming over.
I'm almost too hungover to function. Got into the wrong car by mistake. there was a rotweiler in it. Thank god he was more confused than i was for a minute.
Doing laundry. My jeans from last night smell like chicken wings and motor oil.
You either got a dog, or you have a boy over. I can't tell from the noises which it is.
Does it count as a threesome if your friend drunkenly has sex on top of you while you're passed out?
Alright, I've had enough of this good girl shit. Tonight you either blackout or backout.
Randomize
