he calls his bong barack obonga, commander in kief. i found where i belong.
They're making scrambled eggs at 2 in the morning... with rum
i think i can safely say that is the weirdest thing you've ever propositioned me with. so obviously my answer is yes.
apparently there was a flour fight and couch sex...
The secrurity code on my debit card is 420, can not lose this card.
I no longer see him as a simple set of male genitalia attached to a very sexy body. The title "trophy fuck" seems wrong. Damn.
Just thought you should know, Im with josh now. Im no longer available for rent. I have a full time tenant now. Like, a year long lease at least.
I SHITYOUNOT DAN JUST PUNCHED A DEER IN THE FACE. MID LEAP.
I would have cried, probably tears of wine, but cried nonetheless.
The party was Hollywood themed and I won an oscar for "finest ass in a leading role"
Im gonna go for the gay guy. The ginger is freaking me out.
Yeah, so, that moment when the repair guy comes in and you see your cock ring on the counter one second before he does.
You know how it is. Tell me not to do somebody and suddenly I wanna.
Three times. Three times I left home yesterday in search for sex, and three times I returned un-orgasmed.
Dude, you ever snap awake on the toilet at work with that panicked, "How long have I been here?!" feeling??
Randomize
