i have a strong urge to join the asians in the park doing tai chi. I think im still high .
one more question, do you know why i woke up with 5 pounds of quarters, nickels and dimes in my pocket?
so I smoked with the leasing agent of the apartment complex. Of corse I am going to take this one
just saw a girl come out of the tanning bed room on crutches, now thats determination
We did a shot for each one. Father... son... and holy ghost. That wasn't enough though so we moved on to toasting dead relatives.
It was horrifying, i havent seen a girls mouth open that wide since that one episode of Goosebumps..
It just goes to show you, your dreams can come true. You can hook up with your dads hot married friend.
Driving a mountain pass in the middle of a blizzard with the worst vodka gummybear hangover ever is gods way of telling me to keep the black-outing within a 15 mile radius to my house.
he threw up in a solo cup, then washed it out and used it to play flip cup. Im not sure if thats resourceful or disgusting.
Dropping acid was like seeing the whole world as a blank canvas to imagine anything I wanted.
And apparently all you wanted was to watch the sun explode and me take 60,000 dicks to the face.
You took a selfie with my hard dick and sent it to Scott with the caption 'Toldja'. It was hard to forget you're a teenager after that
I woke up this morning with 3 phone numbers, a red Chinese New Year envelope with cash in it, and a winning scratcher all stuffed in my bra. I'd say it was a pretty successful Thursday night.
I should not be this drunk in a place where a girl is wearing a princess dress
He showed up at my house with roses and a bottle of vodka... to watch a movie. obvi i took the vodka and didn't sleep with him
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
Randomize