she takes plan B like it's going out of style
I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
The best part of listening to lady gaga while high is that any word your brain puts in is right.
He sent a pic, I sent one back. Then nothing. It's like we sext-messaged goodbye and ended the relationship.
I don't know what you're talking about. I just drank beer out of my own bellybutton by doing a backbend and letting it run down my body.
It'll be like a meth lab. But with jello.
Bring enough bail money and little extra for tacos after
CAN I EVER JUST MAKE OUT EITH SOMEONE AND NOT GET FRIEND REQUESTED BY THEM THE NEXT DAY.
That accounts for only three of the penises
I tried to have a quickie with him at the company happy hour. I think I need to quit my job.
I woke up covered in thousand island dressing. I need answers.
I worry about your feelings an awful lot for somebody who gets off on making you cry
You chugged Absolut from a beer bong. Why WOULDN'T you be a champion?
He made me spaghetti, gave me wine and I fucked him on the floor, Is that a fair trade of services to you?
Laying in bed naked is fun. I now see why guys love boobs... They're sooo bouncy! This long distance relationship is really killing my sex life.
Randomize
