I just realized this is gonna be the last time that I'm high in my childhood home. I'm kinda sad. I'm really high..
he's from indiana, of course he's clueless about "g-spots"
Drinking with birthday clown in the backyard shed at a 5 year olds birthday party at 12 in the afternoon. My life doesn't need any adjustments
mom just asked if we are going to need more kaluha as she pulls 5 out of the cupboard. this xmas might kill me
There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent.
The Ex's are trying to talk to the GF. Game face bro.
So, I was thinking... Since this restraining order doesn't go into affect until monday, that leaves us 5 days to wreck his world.
I can't find the keys to get out of my front door, there are random socks in my bicycle basket and I can see a plastic handle of cheap vodka sitting on my porch. oh, and my head just broke u with me.
I think being an adult is being able to say no to free shots...I need to work on that.
We should probably go now, otherwise the whores will descend.
The great part about clubs is that you can fart everywhere and nobody knows! The bad part is I'm on e and i have nobody to fondle.
Just took a shot of 151, rimmned my middle finger in it, lit it on fire and lit a cigarette off it while flicking off my boss. How was your night??
I'm over being sad. I'm now onto thinking about all the ways in which he is a total fuckwaste
I just found a baklava I forgot I got last night so we can call it a day
I saw that he had a tattoo of a map of New Jersey on his arm, so i slowed down to like 20mph and pushed him out of the car
Randomize
