3:38a: you guys up to anything right now?
some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
My Hamptons summer hookup resume reads like a walk-in clinic waiting list.
Why did that cocktail waitress get to sleep with Tiger for 2 years, and all I ever got for living in Whorelando for five years is a couple of pictures with Joey Fatone
So i've def seen the girl running for student body VP getting fingered in a bar.
dude, she was giving me a lapdance and her thong had a skid mark. no I did not hit it.
Just got a lapdance on the metro. She said she was on maternity leave and needed the practice.
I feel as if I owe my bloodstream some tequila.
My professors need to stop cancelling class. Bad things happen when I have too much free time on my hands. Bad things.
I just saw that cheerleader from u of arkansas that I hooked up with over spring break on espn. My parents would be so proud.
If it's up to me, I'll already have my pants on and walking out before he gets soft afterward.
i just remember sliding through the snow and yelling i love america before puking on the oncoming cars
I might have pissed in the corner of someone's shed. They have nice lawn mower.
Are u guys proud? I puked my brains out last night at a strip club. While my two fave strippèrs held my hair
Explain to me how we're not being documented on? A gynecologist I saw two times 8 years ago popped up on my people you may know list on fb. What in the actual fuck?
Randomize