Tried killing a moth in our bathroom. Water everywhere. Don't worry about it.
I just signed a document stating that I would dd all summer if they would go pickup food.
birth control should be required to get into college
So I cleaned the toilet last night at 2 am and woke up with pink eye. Never doing that again.
He said he wants to make an itinerary for the sex we'll have when I come home.
Whatever. It was high school. Back then I'd blow anyone who had enough room between their chest and their steering wheel for my head to fit.
He appeared on my 7th floor fire escape and sang to me and jimmy through the window when we fucked. He's like a drunken mix of Sinatra and Spiderman.
Oh my Christ. I just came so hard my penis stood back up and took a bow afterwards. I need Thai food.
That was the apt with beer in the juice and the floor caving in. Don't go.
Remind me to call McDonald's to give a good review of Ruth. She truly demonstrated grace under pressure.
I'm really stoned in my underwear. I probably won't make it to the bar.
I just ate cottage cheese and went to the gym at 6 this morning...the things i'll do because I might get naked in front of a new boy
I can make a sex schedule on Excel and send it to you guys
Just peed on the front lawn of the capital building. Great American.
The waxing lady fingered me during my brazilian. 40 dollars well spent
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