I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
I'm at the bar with Ashley what should I do?
humiliate her
she said "can't you just pull out and cum on my face? I hate scooping jizz out of my vag".
I'm assuming you texted me by mistake. you're not jizzing in or on me again, thanks for playing, douchebag.
He's throwing up in my bed and I'm not even getting fucked for this
We don't have a ruler. Come downstairs and lay in the snow with a boner so we can see how much snow we've gotten. Put your 8 inches to a less shameful use.
$1 margaritas. This happy hour needs to end.
who were those guys at the table sniffing dryer sheets?
I just saw a dude sitting IN a bush, weeping and playing a harmonica. I hope your day is going better than his.
We need to step up our tailgating...they're here drinking out of a prosthetic leg
She said she was hoping I'd be hotter. I told her I didn't see anybody standing in line to titty fuck her either. She was a great kisser.
They have beer where we have blood.
But seriously, I love you and you are a good person and I'll get you some ecstasy
I think he's only dating me for my ass...
Idk what's happening right now but im wearing a tutu and pissed as fuck.
Also you think METH is on the same level of wanting to see the movie cats? We’re gonna unpack that later
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