im so drunk with asians
where?
always
Just got roadhead in a driving snowstorm. That shit should be a Winter X games event.
it's like god just wants me to be high for five days in a row. keep the blizzards coming.
ahh summer, the season during which the prefix for every verb is "get drunk and"
The usual. Woke up on a dog bed with peeps and $11.
In mid-threesome, need more condoms. Wearing a sheet to the gas station. I'll keep you posted
it is a toga and you are a goddess.
I will seriously deflate and melt into the floor into a puddle of devestation, shame and vodka.
wine pong. its mother daughter day and i think she's mad. I smell like jager
We got to the second bar and all he kept saying was "I'm on an alcohol safari!" Best 21st birthday ever.
Nope I went the fuck home like an adult
Did you know that if you chase vodka with cheap red wine it tastes exactly like college alcoholism?
If blow jobs were a super power she'd be in the Justice League.
You have talents. You got me laid two weekends in a row in two different cities.
screwing the intern at work sucks when u find out the boss is too. She is a smoking hot though
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
Randomize
