so that girl updated her facebook status as "had the worst night ever last night"
um, i could be wrong but i think it might've had something to do with mark drunkenly screaming about her unibrow right in front of her
I just Googled "how to lose weight but still be an alcoholic."
becoming an adult blows. i don't think its possible for me to wake up for anything that doesn't involve kegs and eggs or half naked bums passed out in our yard.
The amount of pregnancy tests I've taken in my life is unhealthy
Either I'm a lot drunker than I thought, or he has three dicks....
I think I'm gonna have to go with the first one...
He drives a BMW. I have to fuck him. Girl Code Rule #26.
TO ALL WHO WERE IN MY HOUSE LAST NIGHT: WHOEVER STOLE MY BONG AND PUT IT ON THE ROOF WILL BE PAYING MY HOSPITAL BILL FROM LAST NIGHT.. AND BUYING ME A NEW, SWEETER BONG.
i want to go make food but i'll have to face my mom after telling her that the random i'm sleeping with, whose name i don't know, told me I was "too slutty to be his girlfriend" when i was drunk last night
Omg just opened my passenger side door and my outfit from last night is on the floorboard.
Pretty good. They took the stitches out but it still hurts like a bitch. The doctor says I should be off crutches by next week.
Well, that's good. Let's hope drunk you doesn't sabotage you.
I told him we could fuck whenever was concurrent for both of us
Also, full disclose I puked in a fruit barrel box
On a scale of 1 to alcoholic in withdrawal how ready will you be to start drinking as soon as you arrive on campus?
He has a wall filled with panties from past hook ups. So no, I didn't fuck him.
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score onr for mom.
Randomize