I boned her and wore a Freddy mask once. It was pretty lol
Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
i used the pictures of vaginas in your biology book to jack off.
he was so high, he talked to my goldfish for an hour telling him the dangers of overfeeding.
My STD test came back clean. I'd like to thank all the guys I've slept with, they made this possible. I want to say thanks to all my friends, for believing in me living up to the full slut potential. And last but not least, I'd like to thank alcohol. I wouldn't be who I am today w/out you. I feel like I need to frame this...
his dick is like his red hair, amazing but useless
All signs point to mom being high. 1) making chicken at 2 am. 2) dancing to smooth jazz. 3) she asked where the peanut butter was
We're listening to the crystal method and doing bong hits for jesus
How are you texting me from 1998?
I see your smile in the face of every drunk that senses he's about to slay a troll.
Walk of shame. Stopped at an estate sale on the way back to the house. Old lady pulled a condom wrapper of the back of my hoodie. beat that
There. Isnt. A. Single. Person. Who. Is. Not. High. At. Church.
Now everytime I sit on a toilet I think about having sex with him. Great.
I told him that we shouldn't complicate things. He responded with a dick pic.
Can't. Way too high. Forgot how to operate doors. Stuck outside.Come get me.
A friendship for the ages born on how horny we both are
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