Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
so i just saw your dad embarking upon a biking journey in full reflective gear
...this stays between you and me
thank god random hookups don't end with college. happy birthday, america.
sex in a tree stand. check.
you lucky bastard
I would fuck him In a heartbeat, an obese child running up stairs with an irregular heartbeat, heartbeat.
i want to go make food but i'll have to face my mom after telling her that the random i'm sleeping with, whose name i don't know, told me I was "too slutty to be his girlfriend" when i was drunk last night
Noo.... Like in the attic of a crack house with nitrous and fat chicks weird....
I seriously think I may just have to live here. In this bed. Naked.
dude his girlfriend left the meanest shit just marinating in our toilet. I'm gonna have to snap chat this out, theres no other option. prepare yourself
You also spilled beer on my dog and tried to wipe it off with a paper towel but he kept getting away from you.
I'm not sure. But he has a pet sugar glider. So, points either way
As long as that's not his name for his dick.
That was when I yelled "Wisconsin powers activate!" and took off sprinting across the ice
YOU HAVE BEEN BAD TOUCHED BY THE LEPRECHAUN OF CHOICES
I just wrote a self loathing message to self, wrapped my credit card in it, put it in an envelope, sealed it with another hate messame, and put it in my lock box. So. That's where I'm at.
I made a powerpoint to trip to.
you are so studious.
Randomize
