Can we talk about the cons of throwing up in the bathtub. there are no pros.
Who would have thought the night we were surrounded by 4 cops would be the most responsible night of the week.
i guess i had fun last thursday night because when i got on the drunk bus this thursday night everyone immediatley started chanting my name and telling me to do a bus flip
whats a bus flip?
idk but apparently i invented it
He said finals are more important than getting stoned on 4/20. I'm proud in a disappointing kinda way
I don't know, but I don't want you to think its ok to show up at my house at 4 am with a gorilla suit and a bucket of pinnapple and think id be ok with it
Honestly, I've had enough of his asshole to last me the new year.
Please tell me you're talking about his personality.
I know this is random but to this day I regret not having sex with you on that atv on the top of that mountain underneath the American flag.
oh sorry. I thought "boat" was code for "penis"
I woke up in a poorly constructed blanket fort on a strange office floor covered in rug burns and champagne. How was your night?
Come on there are only so many drink coaster sizes nipples in the world
I'm too old for chlamydia. That's for 20 year olds who go to clubs and do drugs I've never heard of.
I just remember lots of butts and something about ranch dressing.
True friendship: When you can hold your best friend's hair and still eat your Stromboli at the same time.
I'm currently sitting at your kitchen table eating chicken nuggets that I dug out of the trash and thinking about how much I need to get laid.
Why were you doing tequila shots out of Boston Pizza dip containers?
Randomize
