return my video game
my lips still taste like vagina
so you liked breakfast?
ehh, still wish we woulda went to IHOP instead
You ad-libbed two DETAILED rounds of price is right, 1 wheel of fortune, and 1 deal or no deal.... by yourself with sound effects and music included
My only regret is not throwing up on the conveyor belt in the dining hall
Just used the leftover candycorn for candycorn vodka. Our house is trying to continue the Halloween spirit for as long as possible.
I told him I had to grab my Swedish fish from the car before they froze. Then I just left. But the fact that he knew how important it was not to have my fish freeze almost made me come back in....almost.
He's going to let me keep his bowl in my car. Does that make us Facebook official?
KNEE DEEP IN HOES. SEND HELP.
It has been so long since I got any action that I have decided to change my vagina's name from "the chamber of judgement" to "the cave of forgotten dreams".
I'd help you out but I got Bacardi and Tequila poured down my snorkel last night and I'm still drunk
The kitchen also doubles as a screaming room after midnight as long as you have something to muffle the sound
Good luck. While you're suffocating on a dick, I'll be eating pizza rolls. Being a good girl.
I apparently ooze single. The second I left his house after break up sex five of my old booty calls text me
I can’t tell if I have feelings for him or if my vagina does.
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
Randomize
