Roller skating + drunkeness + peeing = mess
Trying not to fart in the comp lab is going to take everything i've got.
you blew your rape whistle in his face every time he got near a girl till he left the party...
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
He brought a jar of pickles to the party. So now I've had beer, animal crackers, AND a pickle since noon.
He said in a slur "I go so hard, even when I..." and cut himself off by projectile vomiting all over the ice luge.
If we go out with the 22/23 year olds we should make t a double date. I don't want to endure the judging looks of the public as I rob the cradle alone.
Drinking heavily at 3pm and about to rescue a 30lb street turtle. Dont even bother attempting to rise to this level bitch
Ok- my dad's ex-wife's Irish nephew. Weird if we fuck or not?
THERE IS A WINE CUBE IN MY ASS THIS IS NOT GOING AS PLANNED
He goes to Columbia so regardless of how he looks I should fuck him right?
just yelled CURVEBALL at my nightie because it turned out to be a pair of shorts
Am I under any obligation to let my new fuck buddy know I slept with his little sister?
I love him about as much as I'd love fucking myself with a cactus.
There's hope in those eyes, for a better tomorrow or more cocaine, we may never know, but there's hope.
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